alt.fun.with.luc archive - More posts by Luc


My day at the farm

Newsgroups: alt.fun.with.luc
From: ac639@FreeNet.Carleton.CA (Luc F. Theriault)
Subject: My day at the farm
Date: Mon Aug  1 17:29:49 1994


I was a farmboy for a day on Saturday.  With work, we went to a farm about
an hour out of town.  It was cool.

I went on a cool hayride, with no hay (it was just a wooden wagon).  Maybe
they just didn't have any dry hay, since it rained all morning.  But even
if they had hay, I don't know where they would have put it, since there
was a bench already, the hay would have made that bench about 6 feet high.

There were lots of flies.  Millions of them... no googles of them!  And
mosquitos.  I can't forget the mosquitos.  But when I get back, I'm
telling one of the people there about how it was cool, but there were lots
of bugs.  He says "you should have put on some OFF bug repellant - we have
some inside - you want some?  I say "Now?  It's too late now!  Man, where
were you an hour ago?"

So one we went - looked at the animals - they had rabbits, horses, a really
cool donkey, sheep (who don't know the difference between a sheep going 
"baaaaa" and a guy going "baaaaa".  The guy I was with checked.

I don't remember what other kinds of animals there were... oh yeah - a
really cool rooster.  Every little while, in the middle of the day, the
rooster would start his yell thingy (like when they try to wake people
up).  I was thinking of having this conversation with the rooster:

Rooster: cokadoodledoo!

Me: I'm awake!

Rooster: cokadoodledoo!

Me: I'M AWAKE!

Rooster: cokadoodledoo!

Me: OK!  ENOUGH!!!!  DON'T YOU KNOW ANY OTHER WORDS?????

Rooster: cokadoodledoo!

Me: Argh!  I'm leaving!

Organizer: Where you going?

Me: Home.

Organizer: Why?  Wha happened?

Me: Stupid rooster.

Organizer: What's he doing?

Me: Yelling.

Organizer: What's he yelling?

Me: Listen.  He'll do it again.

(wait)

Me: No really, he was - wait - you'll hear him.

(wait)

Me: Ah forget it - I guess he stopped.

Organizer: Ok, I have to go run some errands, I'll be back.

Me: Ok - see you later.

(organizer leaves)

Rooster: cokadoodledoo!

Me: Doh!!!!!!



-Luc Farfannugan Theriault

Coins

Newsgroups: alt.fun.with.luc
From: ac639@FreeNet.Carleton.CA (Luc F. Theriault)
Subject: Coins
Reply-To: ac639@FreeNet.Carleton.CA (Luc F. Theriault)
Date: Mon Aug  1 17:31:24 1994




There are lots of different coins in the world.  You know, I noticed some
of them are big, and some of them are small.

Coins are cool.  otherwise, we'd have to pay a dollar for gum, a dollar
for donuts, a dollar for Power Rangers stickers (Jason would be so sad),
even a dollar for licorice.

Thank you, Mr. Coin.


-Farfannugan

Caramilk secret

Newsgroups: alt.fun.with.luc
From: ac639@FreeNet.Carleton.CA (Luc F. Theriault)
Subject: Caramilk secret
Date: Mon Aug  1 17:32:16 1994



I think I may have discovered the Caramilk secret.  I would tell you, but
it wouldn't be a secret anymore.  Sorry.


-Luc Farfannugan Theriault

What I did yesterday

Newsgroups: alt.fun.with.luc
From: ac639@FreeNet.Carleton.CA (Luc F. Theriault)
Subject: What I did yesterday
Reply-To: ac639@FreeNet.Carleton.CA (Luc F. Theriault)
Date: Mon Aug  1 17:34:43 1994




I worked during the day.  I stopped at Mr C's on the way to work to get a
sandwich and muffin (which I'd keep for lunch).  Mike the
baker/boss/cashier was there.  This is the conversation we had:

Me: Hey

Mike: Hey

Me: You work all the time

Mike: My staff didn't show up

Me: Ah.

(If I had thought of it, I would have said "If I was working here, I would
have showed up!"  But I didn't think of it.

Boring conversation huh?

After work, as soon as I got home (I walked into my room to see if I had
messages and the phone was ringing) Andrew called me and said he was
bored.

We went to McDonalds for supper.  I have high blood pressure, you know.
So I wanted to eat something that wasn't bad for it.  I ordered a chef
salad... they're out of salad.  So I got 2 filet-o-fish thingys and some
fries (and an orange drink).  The guy kept having to get the managers come
over with their magic keys cuz he was punching things in wrong.

While we were in line, Andrew was saying he'd order an orange shake.  I
said "they're good, but the machine is probably broken... it's always
broken in McDonalds.

So Andrew orders... a Big Mac, fries, and an orange shake.  The guy asks
the manager "Do we have orange shakes?"  The manager says "No, the orange
shake machine is broken".  Wow, was I ever surprised.

Then, we decided to go visit my mom.

On the way there, we stopped at Mr C's to get her a donut.  Mike wasn't there.

We hung around for a while, listened to the person making announcements (I
still think they're doing that on a megaphone), then I said "You wanna see
me do the running man?"  My mom says "What's the running man?"  So I
danced.

Then, on the way back, we saw tons of seagulls in a field neart the
highway.  I said "Hey, it's a seagull reunion".  I opened tyhe window and
yelled "Happy anniversary!!!"  "HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!"  Then Andrew says
"congratulations!".  I yell "CONGRATULATIONS!!!!"  It was cool.

Then we went to rent a movie.  We rented "The Fugitive".

On the way home from the movie place, this is the conversation we had:


Andrew: "I have 2 hours - how long is the movie? (he had to work last night)

Me: 133 minutes (13 minutes too long) - Cool it's in COLOUR!

Andrew: Really?  Lucky you got that colour tv!

Me: No kidding.  What are you gonna do?  You'll miss part of the movie.

Andrew: I don't know.  We'll see.

Me: Hey, look, a dead bird!

Andrew: (looks up) Where?


Ok, ok - I made up the part about the bird.

So we started to watch the movie - After about 5 minutes?  I said "Is it
almost over?"  "Is that guy a fugitive?".  Andrew said "no" to the 1st
question, "not yet" to the second.  Then I asked "When do I get to throw
the rice?".

Then, every 10 minutes or so, I asked "*Now* is he a fugitive?"

The answers varied from "not yet", to "almost", to nothing... I was
invisible!!!! (or maybe he was ignoring me).

Then, finally, he becomes a fugitive.  I tell Andrew "You know what's
weird?  He's a fugitive, and they named the movie 'The Fugitive'.  What a
coincidence!".

Then, the movie ended, and Andrew left for work.  I went to sleep early
again.  Cool!

That is what I did yesterday.



-Luc Farfannugan Theriault

Careers

Newsgroups: alt.fun.with.luc
From: ac639@FreeNet.Carleton.CA (Luc F. Theriault)
Subject: Careers
Date: Tue Aug 23 14:03:23 1994


I found the results to a career test I did a few years ago.

Apparently, there are no jobs that match exactly what I want.  In one of
the categories, the jobs I'm most suited for are:

Aerial photographer  (That would be a cool job)
Artist  (I can't paint very well)
Artist (paintings)  (I can't paint very well)
Press photographer
Photographer
Sculptor  (I can't sculpt very well)
Special effects technician  (Cool!)

The jobs I'm more or less suited for...

Actor  (Cool!!!!!!  I'll be the richest man, in allll the land))
Commercial writer
Animation artist  (I can't draw very well)
Radio announcer  (Cool!  Lucky I went to radio school)
Artistic director  (I know nothing about art)
Film cameraperson  (That I could do)
Cartoonist  (I can't draw very well)
Choreographer  (I can't dance very well)
Clown

Clown!!!!!!!   I'm suited to be a full-time clown!!!!!


I could make people laugh... and get paid for it!  Shaba!


-Luc Farannugan Theriault

My day at school

Newsgroups: alt.fun.with.luc
From: ac639@FreeNet.Carleton.CA (Luc F. Theriault)
Subject: My day at school
Date: Wed Aug 31 13:45:02 1994



I went to take a small business course on saturday with Andrew.

We got there a few minutes late - it was sort of my fault...  Ok, it was
completely my fault.

After a few minutes of sitting there, I started to get bored.  So I looked
around.  I noticed all the different colours of paint they used in the
room...  I looked at the ceiling.  One of the vent thingys for the heating
was painted yellow, the other one was orange.  I looked in the classroom
next to ours.  I only saw an orange one...

At the break, I asked Andrew if he remembered sitting on the 2 back legs
of his chair, trying to balance himself... then almost falling down... when 
he was a kid.

He showed me how he used to balance himself... on one leg.  I tried it.
It's tough.

You know what was really weird?  Our classroom had only black chairs.  But
the classroom next door had black and a few blue chairs.  I would have
liked to have a blue chair.

I went for a walk into the other classroom (there was no one in it).  I
noticed a sign in the front, made for the students...

It said:

2 + 2 =

a) 2

b) 4

c) 22

d) 0

e) not given

Of course, the answer is e) not given - since everybody knows 2 + 2 is 5.

I brought the sign back to our classroom and showed it to some people in
the class.  Our instructor thought I was vandalizing it...  I wouldn't do
that...

So then, the class started again.  I started to look at the walls.  The
front wall was painted beige.  The back one was purple.  I think they got
their paint on sale, in small quantities.  Oh, and it was then I noticed
that the classroom next to ours had 2 vent thingys as well... one was
orange and the other one was yellow.  I couldn't see the second one earlier...

The walls are the same colour in the other classroom.

Lunchtime.  We went to a sub place.  This is what happened:

Andrew and I walk in...

Me:  You go first, I don't know what I want yet.

Andrew:  I don't either.

Sub Girl:  As long as you don't order a Big Mac or a Quarter Pounder.

Me:  Ok, could I get a Filet-O-Fish?

Sub Girl: (calls out the other sub girl)  Sally, someone wants a Filet-O-Fish.

Sally: flergen shmergen (I didn't understand a word she said)

We ordered our food.  Then we went to the pizza place next door because I
wanted cheesecake.  I got cheesecake, talked to Hassan, the owner for a
few minutes, then we left.  We got back to class.  My cheesecake was
frozen.. I tried to eat it anyways.  It was tough.  As I ate it, and drank
my orange drink, I kept looking at the sign above the board that says no
food or drinks.  Then I looked at the teacher drink some of his coffee.

Then it occurred to me... our teacher looked exactly like Alex P. Keaton
from Family Ties.

So we had 45 minutes to go discuss some business stuff.  Everyone went
outside to talk.  I was with a group of people who were ok, but then I
heard the people at the next table.. they were talking about opening a
donut place.  I thought "Shaba!".  Then our instructor came over and said
"Is everything going well over here?".  I said "I want to go with
them!!!".  I didn't.

Then we got back to class to talk about the discussion we just had.  Each
group had to let one person present what we talked about.

Teacher:  Ok, who's first?

Me:  The donuts!

Teacher:  Huh?

Me:  The ones that did the donut shop thingy!

Teacher:  You'll hear them soon.

Then the first group presented.  They finished and the instructor asked
who was next...  I said "Donut people!"... It wasn't their turn yet...

Then, finally, after about 15 hours, he tells the people that want to
start a donut shop to talk.  Cool!!!!!

Then we talked about more business stuff.  It got boring for a few
minutes.  I thought it would have been a good time to go to the
washroom... But when I got back, someone said something about donuts.  I
asked Andrew "Did they just talk about the donut shop again?".  He said
yes.  Doh!!!!!!!!!

Then the class ended.  I went to work.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot.  We went past the elevator every time we went
downstairs.


That is what I did saturday.

-Luc Farfannugan Theriault

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